I'm A Legal Alien Now

Tuesday, May 29, 2007


I wouldn't say that this photo was the defining reason why I bought new pants at Benetton yesterday, but it did have some influence- primarily the guy's face on the left. I discovered in New York on Friday that my new work pants, barely two days old and not yet washed, had shredded down one side due to luggage-related abrasions. Ridiculous! I am going to return them tomorrow. We shall give these Benetton pants a go, and if they're alright I'll buy another pair. I don't know why I'm so resistant to work pant purchases and instead wear one pair to the bone. People must talk. I buy shirts and ties like crazy, so maybe I can fool them.

I have drinks tonight with my secret husband which has me all a-flutter as I don't even know if he's gay and I've built it up in my head practically to marriage and adopting Cambodian orphans.

It is very humid and gross. It will be a long four months. I've started using the a/c whenever I sleep- it's very noisy but I figure I'll learn to sleep through it now so that it doesn't bother me when I really need it in July and August.

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Sunday, May 27, 2007

New York, not really a pictorial report

It is rather early but I woke up because I was so sticky and hot. I've turned on my bedroom airconditioner and sealed up the room to try and refrigerate it a little before going back to bed. I also had a rather hilarious voicemail from Sexy T who is at the beach and, by the sounds of it, completely hammered.

Yesterday morning, Xena and I took the Acela up to New York for some work-type things. We spent most of the day doing such things in a gallery in Chelsea, apart from a side visit to the most amazing office ever. I can't explain how much I covet this office. It's in a building at 601 26th Street, a really elegant old skyscraper with a curve in its design. We took the lift up to the 16th floor to this modeling agency. The interior of the building is still very daggy and industrial- concrete floors, rough white brick walls and the pipes running along the roof but then each office (both Hilfiger and Martha Stewart have their showrooms in this building) is individually decorated rather sensationally. But what really made me covet it was the view- over the river, Jersey and the uptown skyline. It was heartbreaking to think that not only are these people beautiful and rich, they have sensational office space.

Anyway, we ended up at City Hall Park which was unexpectedly beautiful in the late afternoon with office workers and the fountain and a stack of Calder stabiles dotted round the place. Drinks and dinner followed, whereupon Xena and I got totally smashed and played fashion police and at one point were laughing so hard on 7th Avenue that we both thought we would wet ourselves. If only we could remember what was so hilarious.

We staggered to the Met Museum yesterday morning to see the Poiret show. It was a wonderful, nay, superb exhibition. We also checked out their Barcelona Modernity show, which wasn't that great, and then up to the roof for lunch and Frank Stella sculptures. I became very displeased at their no-photo rule of the artwork (not that it stopped me) as I think is particularly wanky not to allow photographs of outdoor art.

This was followed by the exclusive Monet show at the Wildenstein Company, an extremely prestigious art gallery, which was beautiful but their staff made the experience so unpleasant. Sort of cross snooty door bitch with power-mad bouncer in a dark suit. The works were stunning though, and then someone important invited us into his office to show us some works from the Napoleon era which were for sale (starting at $225,000) and he was so nice it greatly improved the whole experience.

A quick coffee at Barneys followed (how I adore it) before leaving Xena and returning to DC on the Regional (Business Class happily so very pleasant). I also totally love Union Station.

Now, some photos from the Roof Garden:

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Thursday, May 24, 2007

Jenufa = Pretty Bloody Fantastic

Tonight I broke the opera drought with an outing to Jenufa at the Washington National Opera with Patricia Racette in the lead.

It was pretty bloody brilliant.

It was also gay night at the opera and there was supposedly a post-show reception of some description but the usher didn't seem to know anything about it so I came home. Which, all this considered, is just as well as I have a 9am Acela to catch as it has been decided I need to spend tomorrow and Saturday morning in New York for work, so hurrah for spontaneous trips to New York!

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Sunday, May 20, 2007

The Simpsons 400th Episode, Does Anyone Really Care?

Simpsons 400 episode- what the fuck?

Good premise, terrible execution. Sadly the problem with the Simpsons for the past few years. I never thought I'd say this, but it has to end. Occasionally I see one of the classics- Marge's pretzels for a random example- and realise how bad it has got.

Last night was baseball, and it was a terrible game but the company made it great fun. Nothing happened until the last ten minutes and we had to have three extra innings. Bastards!

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Saturday, May 19, 2007

A little bit of reflection

At 2am this morning, as I was violently ill from either alcohol or shoddy Mexican food, I reflected that I have done more drinking in the past few months than I probably have collectively done in my entire life.

Last night there was about, oh, eight hours of fairly steady drinking. I don't actually know how many glasses of red wine I had. Dapper was back for a flying visit, so there were drinks then. Then I kicked on to Happy Hour following which Scarlett & I went with Gonzalez's friend KSH and her husband to some awful bar on L Street where we were all totally tanked. Before finding the awful bar, we accidentally went into this horrible black bar. However KSH's friend did steal a complete roll of toilet paper for reasons which now escape me.

We also got the somewhat sobering news that Gonzalez's boyfriend is being shipped to Iraq, for eight months. Jeez.


Sunday, May 13, 2007

Hot Fuzz

Saw the movie Hot Fuzz tonight and it was brill. It's a bit gross in parts but it is also so wonderfully funny and slapsticky in a satirical sort of way. Also, as I just discovered, Cate Blanchett has a cameo.

Today was Europe in DC, when lots of the EU embassies have open days. It turned out to be really popular- we tried to visit the famed Italian cafeteria but the line was so long. We endured briefer queues for Cyprus and Finland though. Got some pamphlets. It could be a really great thing, but there's only so many pamphlets I can feign interest in.


Friday, May 11, 2007

Bad Surveys

As I have nowhere else to post my rage, I shall share it with my reader.

I really hate bad surveys. Ever since I did surprisingly well at marketing research during my masters bad surveys have stood out to me like the turd in the punchbowl. The following survey, which I came upon by the usually so wonderful Go Fug Yourself, has so many horrible horrible aspects to it. I nearly always agree to take surveys because I know how valuable the results can be, but this one was horrendous so I started lying out of spite.

It's biggest crime is being too long. Giving someone dozens of options to answer a question means the question is usually poorly designed or not focused enough. The answers are sometimes biased which invalidates research- my favourite was on filesharing- did I believe it should be 'strongly punished, encouraged or ignored'. The 'strongly' throws it to the outfield of bias.

Having to rank my vodka preference out of 100 for what seemed like 100 brands was horrendous. There was so much horrendousness, I need a bit of a lie down.

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Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Unicorn Planet

Apart from Crybaby Trolls heeeeyyy... not much has been happening. I've been working a lot but can't blog about it because it would be 'indiscreet'. Everyone was all a flutter with the Queen around in town (including, I admit, myself whose interest in Royalty was piqued).

I bought new bed linen- a wonderful bed-in-a-bag from Target but as sadly predicted, the pillowcases don't fit my enormous pillows. I tried to buy new matching cases but it was too hard so I bought new pillows instead. This means, Anne, that you will have giganto-pillows when you come to visit. I also have a new armchair, but am yet to put it together.

It never ceases to amaze me that my furniture comes through the post.

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Thursday, May 03, 2007


I just booked a flight to Mexico City for the last week of June.

Mexico City? I haven't really thought this through in any detail but what the hell. Mexico City here I come!


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